I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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