The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
