he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
