I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
