Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
