He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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