remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Drake has all the answers
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
