just tell him i said nine months
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
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