Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
