So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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