I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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