Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
