Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize