how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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