We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
