If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
