are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
