I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
