Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
