ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
