Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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