White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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