no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
