i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
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