He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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