Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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