I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
