i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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