He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
