Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
We have started to decorate penises.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize