the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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