I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
