so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
