before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
