Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
