how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize