just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
