he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
