so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I need to sanitize my soul.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
