we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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