i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
