dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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