I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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