Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
