and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
