you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
