all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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