My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
