you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
God, I missed his penis.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
