The maid of honor just puked.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
